Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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