I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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