Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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