He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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