"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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