just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
