the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You know, be my cock's hype man.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize