i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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