I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
