alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
