we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
