it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
