I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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