Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize