your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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