He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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