So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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