my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize