And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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