Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
