I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Randomize
