I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
