So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
