I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
he was CRYING into my vagina
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
