Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Randomize
