Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I need moral support for this bender
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
