Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
