butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
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