matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize