I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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