the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
