just come out here and I will go home with you...
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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