it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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