It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize