i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
