Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
