I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
It's shark week go big or go home
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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