I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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