Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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