And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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