I wannas sexs uuuuu
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Randomize
