Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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