You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
