Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
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