he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize