He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
