a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
