i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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