No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
