If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
