An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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